Why do you care what others think?

Let's Drill deep on the importance of not caring what other people think about you, and your direction.

Question: When was the last time you looked internally or externally look to someone to approve of you?

Did you do that on any level? And did that thought based on whether it was approved or even disapprove, influence your decision to go forward or to hold you back? If it did, you my friend might be struggling with addiction to approval.

Even though you might not recognize how powerful a force it is in your life, it’s probably playing on you more than you care to admit.

I know how hard it is to live a life free of others opinions or approval even if we don’t know who they are.

Say for instance, you stop at a red light and your listening to Christian music, someone pulls up beside you and their window is down, a total stranger but you turn the music down for fear of what they may think?

This also goes on to a place where we are on social media, posting and asking people what do you think? How do I look? What should I do? Then what happens based upon these opinions, it shapes how we decide, it starts to shape how we feel, and shape our decisions because we are so addicted to somebody else’s opinion.

This is a place that we all have to work on. It’s a deep sense of esteem that we have to develop.

So why do we care about what other people think of us?

In Psychology today it states “One of our more enduring social fallacies is the idea that what others think of us actually matters. While this notion clearly has primal evolutionary roots, its shift from survival instinct to social imperative has become one of our greatest obstacles to self-acceptance.”

When this balance shifts from seeking approval or attempting to control outcomes, we become externally focus and can literally lose sight of our central nature. This nature is different from the Ego self, it influences what is outside of us. In looking out rather than inward, our sense of self and sense of place become clouded. The more we attempt to establish through sense of external means, the more clouded our vision becomes and the farther we get from our authentic self. Instead of being fully present in our social interactions, our thoughts and behaviors becomes means for soliciting a response rather than an expression of self value.

The Ego self is a false self. Our self image, our social mask, the role we are playing is driven by and thrives on approval. The Self criticism and self talk are fear based. That fear derives from any number of sources like we’ve been disapproving of our self. So why not start approving of our self and see what happens next.

Why Do We Care About What Others Think?

~ What stops an unhappy woman from leaving her husband or lover?

~ What prevents someone who is miserable in their job from taking a switch?

Ultimately it comes down to us looking for approval, and in some cases, making sure we don’t receive disapproval from others.

The need for approval is conditioned in us from the day we were born.

Approval from others gives us a higher sense of self-esteem.

We’re convinced their recognition matters to our self-worth and how deeply we value ourselves.

Here are 6 signs that you might suffer from the addiction of others:

1. You are concerned about what others are saying or think about you.

2. You have good ideas and intentions but find yourself afraid to act on them.

3. You over leverage yourself financially in the last decade with cars, clothes, jewelry and more.

4. You are constantly seeking other approvals or avoiding their disapproval.

5. Your afraid to speak in public.

6. Your afraid to speak your mind.

In order to get to a place where the outside opinion of others whether it’s voiced or not and your belief in what they think, the way to over come this is practice. So in order for you to practice anything, you have to be aware that it exists.

For example: For the ladies, if you wear make-up every day and you are concerned about if you don’t wear make-up, how people will look at you or see you then maybe you need to practice not wearing make-up. Maybe it’s a car you drive and your concerned about what people will say (whether they voice it or not) about the car you drive so you make every excuse on why it looks that way. If this is you, then you are caught up in their opinions.

At what point can we navigate this world with being ok with who we are and what we are no matter the condition?

~ What happen to a world of individuals?

~ What happen to a world of people standing tall in their beliefs?

~ Why do we want to blend in so much?

~ Who are we really? When somebody says who are you? What’s your name?

You may call out your first name, maybe your last name but you really have no earthly ideal who you are really? Because most people have shaped their entire life around someone’s opinion about how you dress, someone else opinion about how you speak, someone else opinion about your education level, someone else opinion about your financial status, someone else opinion about what kind of career you should have or how many kids you should have and on and on and on…

Here’s a challenge for you. Write down something you have done in the last month, that you know for sure and be honest with yourself, that I did this because it was right for me! No matter what my wife or husband say or thought about it. No matter what my boss said about it, no matter what my neighbor thought about it.

When was the last time you stepped into your own life with that degree of self-worth and value.

You cannot overcome something if you are not rigorously honest about it.

Go find a way to build yourself, it’s called self-esteem.

It’s your time to be more accepting of who you were called to be and build who you are meant to be.

Walk boldly and step boldly into your Day!

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